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Frank F Fat, Old, and Sassy

Joined: 10 Nov 2004 Posts: 4421 Location: Park City, Utah
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Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2007 6:58 pm Post subject: You know you are in California when... |
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Not to be outdone by all the redneck, hillbilly, & Texan jokes... Here are the Top 23 answers about Calli-forn-ya.
You know you're in California when......
1. Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.
2. You make over $300,000 a year and still can't afford a house.
3. You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a
conversation in English.
4. Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is
named Breeze.
5. You can't remember... is pot illegal?
6. You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a DNA donor.
7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are
grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.
8. You know which restaurant serves the freshest arugula.
9. You can't remember... is pot illegal?
10. A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.
11. A low speed police pursuit will interrupt ANY TV broadcast.
12. Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.
13. A man gets on the bus in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps.
You don't even notice.
14. Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am in Starbucks wearing the
baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS George Clooney.
15. Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.
16. Your hairdresser is straight, your plumber is gay, the woman who delivers your mail AND your Mary Kay rep are both guys in drag.
17. You can't remember... is pot illegal?
18. It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news
station: "STORM WATCH 2007."
19. You have to leave the big company meeting early because Billy Lanks himself is teaching the 4:00pm Tae Bo class.
20. You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cells or Blackberries.
21. It's barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour
early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.
22. Both you AND your dog have therapists.
23. You can't remember... is pot illegal?
Toodles
FF _________________ Be thankful for the bad things in life. They opened your eyes to the good things you weren't paying attention to before. email: thevoice@usa.com |
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TDAVID Contributor

Joined: 07 Apr 2007 Posts: 31 Location: Denver, CO
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Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2007 8:18 pm Post subject: |
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this is why I live in Colorado. I think. But then we've got 'the people's republic of Boulder'. What can I say? _________________ T. David Rutherford
www.TDavidR.com
303-475-7922 |
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asnively Triple G

Joined: 17 Jun 2006 Posts: 3204 Location: Los Angeles
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Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2007 9:11 pm Post subject: |
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About "storm watch": We've been on "storm watch" here in Los Angeles this weekend. My husband was thinking of going to Home Depot to buy HVAC filters.
I said "It's 60 degrees and sprinkling out there! Do you really want to go out in THAT?"
I was serious.
_________________
economic depression
Last edited by asnively on Fri Feb 27, 2009 1:59 am; edited 1 time in total |
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Gp Guest
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Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2007 9:13 pm Post subject: |
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It is illegal...isn't it? |
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Philip Banks Je Ne Sais Quoi

Joined: 20 Jun 2005 Posts: 11076 Location: Portgordon, Scotland
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Posted: Sun Apr 22, 2007 11:45 pm Post subject: |
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24 - Your pool cleaner is a Voice Talent, you know this because your
gardener is his coach.
25 - The muggers have installment plans.
26 - Your hairdresser decided not to run for President when he discovered
Camp David isn't a person.
27 - The Police get time off for auditions.
28 - You're friends with people you don't like.
29 - Your Pastor and your favourite porn star are the same person.
30 - The teenager who delivers your newspapers drives a BMW M3
Convertible because his parents are considered low income. |
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davidmonteath Lucky 700

Joined: 17 Apr 2007 Posts: 755 Location: Buckinghamshire, UK
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Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2007 1:37 am Post subject: |
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I don't think it was legal when I lived there..!!!!  _________________ www.davidmonteath.com
Sponsor of Voice APpreciation Indulgence Day 2010
Proud member of Self Appointed Voice-Over Experts Discussion Group - overenthusiastic pontification a speciality. |
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asnively Triple G

Joined: 17 Jun 2006 Posts: 3204 Location: Los Angeles
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Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2007 2:22 am Post subject: |
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Those are very good, Banksey!
_________________
us economy recession
Last edited by asnively on Sun Mar 01, 2009 3:55 am; edited 1 time in total |
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Vance Elderkin Contributor IV
Joined: 02 Feb 2007 Posts: 133
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Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2007 3:26 am Post subject: |
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31. The high school quarterback calls a timeout so he can get a text message. |
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bobbinbeamo M&M

Joined: 05 Mar 2007 Posts: 2468 Location: Wherever I happen to be
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Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2007 8:47 pm Post subject: |
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F2-hey hey hey....I've lived in California for 22+ years and this is all
TRUE! (especially if your're in LALA Land.)
There's a very funny book that came out in the 80's called "How to California". Still hilarious.
Ya gotta be able to laugh at yourself. _________________ Bobbin Beam
www.bobbinbeam.com
blog.bobbinbeam.com |
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