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Industrial/Narration Demo for consideration
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Yoda117
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 2:03 pm    Post subject: Industrial/Narration Demo for consideration Reply with quote

Be gentle... or not Wink

http://209.35.221.188/mars/Houser.mp3

NB: this is more of an industrial track and covers a good spectrum of the type of copy I get for this kind of booking (as opposed to commercial).
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Last edited by Yoda117 on Wed Jan 17, 2007 2:16 pm; edited 1 time in total
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DaveChristi
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 2:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Though this is not the type of VO that I do (I can't even SAY nondihydrowhosawhatsis) here's my thought.

In the first 30-seconds I noticed the demo sounded disjointed. It didn't flow. At first I thought it was the editing, but on review I noticed a lot of pauses. The style of the read distracted me from the quality of your voice. Also, the music under several pieces seemed too hot... take it down a notch, or eliminate it if you can.

Just my 2¢
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Dave "Christi" Felton
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bobsouer
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 3:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Greg,

I'm buried in work of this very sort at the moment, but took a short break to listen to your demo.

I agree with Dave that the cuts at the start of your demo all have a short of halting delivery that doesn't put you in the best light. Listen to how much more powerfully you communicate the message of the last two tracks in comparison.

At the very least, I would change the order to bring the pieces from the end up to the beginning. (To my ears the music mixed seemed OK. Not outstandingly great, but serviceable.)
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Bob Souer (just think of lemons)
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Yoda117
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 4:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Actually, I noticed that there were significant pauses as well...

but yet, looking at the track on the CD, they're not nearly as long (which is damn odd). I know enough to know that this is not a technical issue (ie; buffer underrun), so I'm curious as to why I am seeing a measurably longer pause on the MP3 from the recording facility that has the site, when compared to the track that I have in my possession.

I'll have to evaluate the tracks again (I do not have a master of this, as it was done by JoellaArts for me), but methinks that it might be worth grabbing one or two of these and using new material for the rest (although I do enjoy the one about tactical systems... Smile ).
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Mushmelon
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 4:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Greg, the pauses that concern me are WITHIN each segment, not between them. It is more in line with the type of delivery. I agree with Bob in that the last 2 segments seem to be the strongest.
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DaveChristi
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 4:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mushmelon wrote:
Greg, the pauses that concern me are WITHIN each segment, not between them.


This was my concern as well.
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Dave "Christi" Felton
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Yoda117
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 4:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mushmelon wrote:
Greg, the pauses that concern me are WITHIN each segment, not between them. It is more in line with the type of delivery. I agree with Bob in that the last 2 segments seem to be the strongest.


I was referring to all the pauses.

Put another way, there's an extra 4 seconds (3 and hefty change actually) on this thing that are not on my copy.

no issues with the comments regarding delivery, just something else that I noticed
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bobsouer
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 5:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Greg,

Could you post just the first piece as a .WAV file (what you have, I assume?) so that we could compare your delivery on the two recordings? I think that might be quite instructive.
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Yoda117
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 5:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bob,

since this isn't coming from my site, I'll have to use putfile or something.

give me a bit (not currently at home) and I'll try to toss it up.

thanks for all the critiques thus far, my radar just got tripped when I saw the length of time after playing the mp3 it from the link (I put the length of time on paper and I can't seem to get it out of my head now, lol).
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bobsouer
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 5:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Greg,

I'd be happy to host the file for you. I can take an email with an attachment of as much as 4 Meg. My email is available through the little button at the bottom of each of my posts or through my site and blog.

Send it along and I'll email you a URL directly to it from my site. (I have 40 Gig of server space to spare, so this isn't any problem.)
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DaveChristi
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 5:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Also, Deebs has said she'll host demos here for a while.
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Mushmelon
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2007 7:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've got a feeling that the extra 3 - 4 seconds on the host's file that are not on Greg's file is the 3 and a half seconds of trailing music at the end of the demo. I think Gregs file dumps quicker than the one we are hearing...just my 2 cents though. I guess we will know for sure when we can hear both versions.
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Yoda117
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 5:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

*ding*ding*ding*

Mushmelon wins an Internet!

That's what it was.

Like I said, I agreed with the delivery issues, it was just that the file I had ran around 1:22, and this one was about 1:26. Stuff like that just drives me nuts (it's a short trip...).

LOL!

As for .wav vs. .mp3... I'll put it up if still requested, but the same issues are there Smile

Looks like this one needs some more work on delivery, or just taking some clips from better spots that I've done Smile
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Blog - A man, a martini, and a lot of microphones
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bobsouer
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 6:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Greg,

Under the circumstances, I don't need to hear the .WAV file. I look forward to hearing your revised demo when you post it.
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Bob Souer (just think of lemons)
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Yoda117
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 7:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks Bob... look forward to putting together another version of this.

Downside of doing this and a FT job... seems you never get a lot of free time, hehe

One thing that I will be changing after listening to this a few hundred times... no RE-20. While a lot of issues with the first two-three spots were delivery IMO, I also didn't feel like I had as much energy as I do when using my U87.

There's a reason I travel with it...
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